My invisible moustache .. no more.

Why is it that the best always die so young? Today, friends, today is a day of loss and of mourning. The moustache that I have nurtured so thoroughly through good times and through bad (yeah, Eileen, you saying that your grandma had a bigger moustache than me is a BAD time!)(ON ITS DEATH BED, no less!) passed on today, at approximately 9 pm. It was 10 (days.)

It was a good moustache, a friendly moustache, always with a smile, a friendly slap on the back, a constructive piece of advice or a tongue-in-cheek male-chauvinistic joke. It was a moustache who cared about the little people. It was charitable, and a pillar of its community, always with a group of friends or general well-wishers surrounding it. Rarely has such mediocre a moustache touched so many lives.

Now, however, its life has been cut short (no pun intended) by the yellow shaving contraption with which I shave. A community has lost its greatest member, an upper lip has lost an important source of warmth, and a nose has lost its snot-trap.

I have made a little song, and it doesn't make much sense, but neither does the original, and at least this is not sung by that bleating douchebag James Blunt. Either way, I hope you can all join me in singing this last, joyful praise of my moustache.


You're Beautiful (My Moustache).

My life was brilliant.
My life was brilliant.
My lip was pure.
But I saw an angelic moustache.
Of that I'm sure.
It smiled at me on the subway.
It was on a trucker dude.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got facial hair of my own.

You're my moustache! You're my moustache!
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your fuzzy face, on a trucker's schnoz,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be able to grow you.

Yes, it caught my eye,
As he trucked on by.
It could see from my face that I was,
Fucking well shaved,
And I don't think that I'll see it again,
But we shared a moment (or actually, it was more like a week or so) that will last 'till the end.

You're my moustache! You're my moustache!
You're my moustache, it's true.
I saw you on some trucker's face, just beneath the nose,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be able to grow you.

La la la la (moooooouuustaaaache) la la la la la (moustache!)

You're my moustache! You're my moustache!
You're my moustache, it's true.
There must be an angel with a moustache on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never have a moustache like you.

Dedicated to my moustache (2007-2007).

In our memory, you will live forever.

(Dude, this must seriously be the worst movie ever.)