Thor finds his Match.

The other day, I made an interesting discovery: I have found my dream woman. Or rather, she found me.

OK, I'll give you some hints:

-She is also known as "The Designate", "the Supreme", "Tara Olson", "Hammer Girl", (and this might be my favorite) "Thorita", "Hammerette", "Thor Lass", "Asgard Lass", "Thoreta", "Hammer Lass", "the Destroyer" (Ouh, baby!), or the "Spirit of the Jewel" (However, this is only in the alternate future)(I know, it is kind of weird, but I apparently have an alternate future)

-She is 5' 9'', but weighs in at a very generous 317 lbs. But of course, she's from outer space, far beyond the reach of the Atkins'.

-Her place of creation/birth is an unnamed planet in unidentified galaxy. So no embarrassing trips to meet her parents, I guess. In fact, she has no known relatives.

-Her main enemies are Thanos, Mangog, Tarakis, and that rascal Grey Gargoyle. Who does he think he is anyway?

-Her intelligence is, with all due respect, not awesome, at only 4/10. However, who the hell wants a smart girlfriend? (?)

Ah, I am not going to tease you anymore! Of course, you've all guessed it anyway: The girl I am talking about is my mythical girlfriend/sidekick/quasi-relative THOR GIRL. Her blond, wavy hair, her voluptuous bosom and her funky golden boots make her the perfect match for me.

In fact, it turns out that I've had many mythical girlfriends. I once met the Amazons. Occasionally, I also crossdress, but in a deathmatch with Wonder Woman, I might have some problems.