Øya? Oia? Uh-ya?

Alright! I haven't blogged for a while, but it's nice to be back here in NYC, where I finally have time to do such stuff! I have lots of stuff to show you guys, so check back soon for awesome pictures from Georgia and Iceland.

First, however, here are some pics from the musical misadventures of my good friend Eivind (IVAN!!) and myself at the Øya festival in Oslo! (The reason I keep calling Eivind "IVAN!!" is that he once called me when I lived in Montana. So I came back from class one day, and my dear roommate Robbie had written a note on my desk - "IVAN!! just called!". Alright, I guess you had to be there, but it was very funny at the time.

This is IVAN!!, casually eating a piece of cardboard. He is obsessed with having a diet rich in paper products, and considers himself to be a paper/cardboard recycling plant. It's a kind of lifestyle that few men dare to choose, but IVAN!! has taken that step, and I respect him greatly for it.

Either way! Øya was cool, and we even had nice weather for the couple of days I was there, which was great, because the festival is on the beach!

Granted, this particular beach, or more specifically, the toxic, fetid, urine-infested cesspool that is the water, is the number one most gross-out, fucked-up thing in the world, full of feces and semi-composed bodies, but still, it is on a beach!

(Speaking of this stuff, our bathroom had all kinds of malfunctions when I came back to the apartment here in NYC, but apparently, today our dear and all-powerful fixer-dude Miguel had started on what will probably be a very long and very tedious pseudo-cleaning-up of the pipes and such in there. However, he did one pretty awesome thing: As you who have ever visited me here know, our dear toilet has been kind of hard to flush - you need to do this whole turny / shaky routine to make it open its own bowels, generously letting the water flow to drown whatever items the patron has donated - but when I got home after a jog earlier tonight, and tried flushing the thing, something happened. Something different. Something powerful.

An ominous silence was slowly replaced by the dooming presence of a distant rumbling. Tiny waves appeared in the water surface deep there in the crater of the bathroom volcano. The rumbling was low at first, but kept becoming stronger. Soon, it went from a deep rumbling to a distant roar, but as the volume increased, the pitch rose, becoming increasingly loud and intense until it reached a sound similar to the screeching scream of a pterodactyl attacking (EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT A FUCKING PTERODACTYL SOUNDS LIKE, OK!?)

The earth went from completely standing still to shaking violently. The room shook, plaster fell from the ceiling. I had to grab hold of the door. The lights were blinking. Birds flew from their trees. And then the flush started. Imagine, dear reader, what it would look like if the Niagara falls hit a small, reasonably priced car. The earth opened, and an enormous, massively powerful world of foaming, frenzying water rushed like a tsunami, gushing into the toilet bowl.

I felt like Moses, a little turn of the flushing button was like him, asking God to part the Red Sea. My white beard, my long, generous hair and my wizard-like robe was blowing in the storm. I raised my wand. "FLUSH!" I bellowed, commanding the toilet to flush. My deposits were like the poor Egyptian soldiers, not standing a chance against the epic crush of a trillion gallons of cold rapids of water.)

(Long story short, now the flushing handle is easier to use.)

Regardless of those minor digressions, IVAN!! and I had a good time there! Apparently, I was wearing my special concert teeth. Others wear earplugs, I have novelty teeth. Oh yeah, and I also tried to grow a trucker moustache for the days the festival lasted, you know, handlebar style, mostly as a fashion statement but also as a tribute to the delightfully moustached women of Georgia. But alas, my moustache, and the rest of my facial hair, is kind of white, so you can't really see it.

(In fact, I discussed this sad fact with some colleagues today, and they suggested that I acquire a colored beard-comb, which adds a little extra shade and flair to my mostly non-existing facial hair, and presumably a little joy to my life. I did not know of such a thing, but for next year's festival, I shall do that, and my moustache shall be a majestic sight that both humans, the wild animals in the forests and the fish in the sea will find irresistible, and all will be at peace in the world.)

Digressions aside - there are a lot of them today - we saw two of my current top 5 favorite bands:

Justice from France, and..

..The New Violators from, like, Namsos or Trondheim or somewhere equally disgusting and fucked-up.

Justice played the most awesome concert ever, whereas the New Violators where pretty lame - I have definitely seen them much much better, and they need to get their guitarist back.

It was pretty cool, because we had VIP tickets, so we could look at the concerts from such comfortable positions as this one:

It was pretty sweet, although both IVAN!!! and I agreed that the VIP place (I guess it was more of a VIP peninsula) was among the lamest thing we had encountered .. There were no freebies! WTF!

Also, Oslo's sunsets are spectacularly beautiful, and it was pretty awesome to have some of the best bands in the world in front of you, and then this crazy sunset behind you. Yes, it's a balloon, people!

This is where I stood about 3 years ago. Good times were had, in other words.

Alright, I gotta go, but in other news, I am as mentioned safely back in NYC, and I'll blog more - much more - soon! Have a great week, everyone!